Hanahaki
by Mellize
Summary: She changed, and he was unable to move forward.


**Disclaimer: I don't own Gintama.**

* * *

 **Hanahaki**

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"Hey. It's been a while, miss piggy!"

Cerulean orbs merely blinked away in response to an insult of a greeting directed to her; her once quick temper had long faded away with age and maturity that it felt nostalgic upon recalling her former personality. She then swiftly turned her focus back to her rival or rather soon-to-be ex-rival with a meaningful intent before a hopeless sigh escaped her soft yet chapped lips and said in a serious tone, _"Sadist. Things are different now, and I have a goal to accomplish so quit it."_

The playful smirk that adorned his defined features had slipped away carelessly and a frown soon replaced upon hearing such words that never seemed to define her as the foul-mouthed, gluttony, and reckless China girl he believed in and knew of. This current China, Kagura had little to none resemblance to her younger self: she stood in a strict posture with her back as straight as the wall, her eyes no longer held the childlike and wild luminescence she once possessed, and as much as he loathed to admit it...he especially missed the colorful words and insults that would spurt out of her mouth as well as the fiery attacks she oh-so desperately ambushed him with.

This China...

It irritates him more than anything else.

"So what?", he starts with furrowed brows and a twisted fraud smile. "Can't keep up with me? How disappointing. I expected more from you..."

Her face remained stoic, barely moving an inch which fueled his anger further. Calloused hands clenched uncontrollably into a pair of angry fists that failed to stop its trembling so he moved them to clutch into the fabric of his _hakama_ , fearing for the worst possible outcome he might do to this **_foreign_** side of her.

 _He never wanted for her to change..._

 _He never did, not in a million years..._

A crazed mantra of rhetoric words like _go back to the way you were_ or _this must be a prank of hers_ danced actively around his confused and disturbed mind, entirely denying this as reality like a stubborn mule for his fragile mentality will shatter into tiny bits much further that had already broke so long with the death of his beloved sister and the disappearance of his gorilla teacher.

His expressionless façade masking his true emotions and current turmoil was but an illusion that hid his mental breakdown which prevented her to look down on him even more. Yet, he wanted to remove it and lash out on her for changing into someone else unknown to him... for leaving him behind.

He felt the fear and agony rising in his chest, suffocating him while the roots of a blooming flower proceeded to grow inside, doubling the pain ten fold.

So he hoped and believed that this was just a prank of hers. His ears strained to hear the _magic_ words he wished of her to say in that rude and juvenile manner of hers, the expected way of his normal feisty China.

But instead his hope was crushed once more as another sentence of melancholic and serious words pierced through his already wounded heart, "Sa-...Okita-san, at least for this one time...take this seriously. I have a goal that I vow to achieve, with the help of my stupid brother, Kamui. Only _he_ can be my key to succession. So if I need to sever our ties then I will **_do_** it."

It was as if the world had stopped turning after hearing her true intentions that he came to understand the change made in her. Earth can't possibly be the place of her Yato training and of course, he wasn't enough for China as her sparring partner anymore. She needed someone stronger and more experienced in the ways of the Yato like Kamui, that insane space criminal he once fought with.

He was no longer capable of it.

His head spun hysterically with beats of throbs that failed to cease in his nervous system as he failed to take in the news very well and got overwhelmed instead. His hand reached to stroke his forehead, in an attempt to calm himself, but it was futile and only made the throbbing feeling worse.

"Tch. Fine, do whatever you want. I was tired of our childish wars anyways."

"Well then, farewell," she bid him a solemnly farewell with a hand waving aimlessly with no specific purpose in life, all hopes of wanting to retain their relationship again vanished like the breeze that passed quietly her by.

He watched hopelessly as her figure disappeared from his sight. Despite the urge to chase after her, his feet were frozen to the ground and all energy from before was lost.

Then the burning feeling in his throat came and he coughed violently. One would be surprised that no blood fell but petals of Sakura instead were falling as if it was autumn and he was a tree shedding its leaves to the solid ground.

Ruby eyes closed themselves, exhausted from the turns of events and he listened the fast beating of his heart.

 _Damn it, why can't I tell her?_

And all faded in darkness...

 **The End.**

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* _Hakama_ \- loose trousers with many pleats in the front.

Author's note: First of all, I'm really sorry if this was too cliché and out of character! It's been a while since I've written a Gintama fic so I will try my best to improve my skills. Also I'm planning to continue my current works like Siblings in Reverse which means, I'm totally back in writing!


End file.
